I always like to know everything about my new friends,
and nothing about my old ones.
Oscar Wilde
True friend stabs you from the front.
Oscar Wilde
In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips.
Salman Rushdie
Monday, October 08, 2007
Thursday, March 29, 2007
To My Girlfriend
That man is richest whose pleasures are the cheapest.
Henry David Thoreau
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
Robert Frost
Henry David Thoreau
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
Robert Frost
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
On War
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
Bertrand Russell
War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.
Ambrose Bierce
You can't say civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
Will Rogers
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
Oscar Wilde
Bertrand Russell
War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.
Ambrose Bierce
You can't say civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
Will Rogers
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
Oscar Wilde
Sunday, January 22, 2006
True or False
I hardly know an intellectual man, even, who is so broad and truly liberal that you can think aloud in his society.
Henry David Thoreau
Some of this is fiction.
Most of this is true.
But which is which and what is what,
I'm not telling you.
Jumper from jumperbailey.com
Henry David Thoreau
Some of this is fiction.
Most of this is true.
But which is which and what is what,
I'm not telling you.
Jumper from jumperbailey.com
Sunday, January 15, 2006
Staying Young
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
Lucille Ball
How about finding things that make you laugh?
Lucille Ball
How about finding things that make you laugh?
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
Fun Things to Do
In the shopping center:
Follow people through the aisles, always staying few feet away until they leave the store.
When some one asks you if you need help, begin to cry and ask,
"Why won't you people just leave me alone?
Set all the alarm clocks to go off at five minute intervals throughout the day.
Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the busy department store.
Relax in the furniture section until you get kicked out.
Follow people through the aisles, always staying few feet away until they leave the store.
When some one asks you if you need help, begin to cry and ask,
"Why won't you people just leave me alone?
Set all the alarm clocks to go off at five minute intervals throughout the day.
Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the busy department store.
Relax in the furniture section until you get kicked out.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
On Immortality
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
Woody Allen
A toy which people cry for,
And on their knees apply for,
Dispute, contend and lie for,
And if allowed
Would be right proud
Eternally to die for
Ambrose Bierce
Woody Allen
A toy which people cry for,
And on their knees apply for,
Dispute, contend and lie for,
And if allowed
Would be right proud
Eternally to die for
Ambrose Bierce
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
T-shirt humor
I’m running out of places to hide the bodies! Don’t piss me off...
To err is human, to blame it on someone else shows management potential.
You'll always be my best friend, you know too much!
I'm multi-talented: I can talk and piss you off at the same time.
To err is human, to blame it on someone else shows management potential.
You'll always be my best friend, you know too much!
I'm multi-talented: I can talk and piss you off at the same time.
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Encyclopedia For Sale
The add in the newspaper: Encyclopedia Britannica for sale. No longer needed. Got married last month. My wife knows everything.
Monday, December 12, 2005
Sunday, October 23, 2005
About Information
Everybody gets so much information all day long that they lose their common sense.
Gertrude Stein
Gertrude Stein
Friday, October 21, 2005
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
About Copyright
Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
Mark Twain
Mark Twain
Thursday, September 22, 2005
About Time
I've been on a calendar, but never on time.
Marilyn Monroe
It's never too late for time management.
Susan H. Cramm
Time is God's way to keep everything from happening at once.
James Brown
The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.
Bertrand Russell
Marilyn Monroe
It's never too late for time management.
Susan H. Cramm
Time is God's way to keep everything from happening at once.
James Brown
The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.
Bertrand Russell
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
On Drinking
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
Humphrey Bogart
I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W.C. Fields
Beer: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Benjamin Franklin
Humphrey Bogart
I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W.C. Fields
Beer: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Benjamin Franklin
Monday, September 19, 2005
On Kids
Be nice to your kids...They will pick out your nursing home.
Never have children, only grandchildren.
Gore Vidal
Never have children, only grandchildren.
Gore Vidal
Sunday, September 18, 2005
Saturday, September 17, 2005
On Warfare
All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must seem inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near. Hold out baits to entice the enemy. Feign disorder, and crush him.
Sun Tzu from The Art of War
Sun Tzu from The Art of War
Thursday, September 15, 2005
Monday, September 05, 2005
Woody Allen
Woody Allen, (born Allen Stewart Königsberg on December 1, 1935), is an American film director, screenwriter, stand up comic, playwright, short story writer, and musician whose large body of work and cerebral style have made him one of the most widely respected and prolific filmmakers in the modern era. He writes and directs his own movies and has acted in many of them as well. Allen draws heavily on literature, philosophy, European cinema and most importantly, New York City, where he was born and in which he has lived all his life, for much of his inspiration.
Allen was born in Brooklyn, New York, into a Jewish family. His parents Martin Konigsberg and Nettea Cherrie, and his sister, Letty, lived in Flatbush, Brooklyn, where he attended a Hebrew school for eight years. After that, he went to Public School 99 and then to Midwood High, where "Red" (as he was called because of his hair) impressed students with his extraordinary talent at cards and magic tricks. To raise money, he began writing gags for the agent David O. Alber, who sold them to newspaper columnists. Reportedly, Allen's first published joke was "I am two with Nature." At sixteen, he started writing for show stars like Sid Caesar and began calling himself Woody Allen. He was a gifted comedian from an early age.
He would later joke that when he was young he was often sent to inter-faith summer camps, in which he "was savagely beaten by children of all races and creeds."
At nineteen, he started writing scripts for The Ed Sullivan Show, The Tonight Show and others. In 1957, he won his first Emmy Award.
He started writing prose and plays, and in 1960, started a new career as a stand-up comedian and also began writing for the popular Candid Camera television show, even appearing in some episodes. Together with his managers he turned his weaknesses into his strengths and developed the neurotic, nervous, and shy figure famous from his later movies. He soon became an immensely popular comedian and appeared frequently in nightclubs and on television.
Examples of Allen's standup act can be heard on the album Standup Comic, including the famous routine wherein Allen brings a live moose to a costume party. The moose comes in second in the costume contest to the Berkowitzes, a couple in a moose costume.
His first movie production was What's New, Pussycat? in 1965, for which he wrote the screenplay. It was a largely unpleasant experience for Allen as he was trapped in Paris for six months during the production. Furthermore, the studio never showed much respect for his script, altering the film to the point where it bore little resemblance to Allen's original vision. Allen's first directorial effort was What's Up, Tiger Lily? (1966), in which an existing Japanese spy movie was redubbed in English by Allen and his friends with completely new, comic dialogue. In 1967, he also appeared in the offbeat James Bond spoof, Casino Royale.
His first conventional directing effort was Take The Money and Run (1969), which was followed by Bananas, Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex (But Were Afraid to Ask), Sleeper, and Love and Death. In 1972, he also starred in the film version of his own play called Play It Again, Sam, which was directed by Herbert Ross. All of Allen's early films are pure comedies that relied heavily on slapstick, inventive sight gags, and non-stop one-liners. Among the many notable influences on these films are Bob Hope and Groucho Marx.
Annie Hall DVD cover his most successful movies were produced in a ten year period starting with Annie Hall; other critical and financial successes were Manhattan, The Purple Rose of Cairo (named by Time Magazine as one of the 100 best films of all time, and Allen's personal favorite) and Hannah and Her Sisters (winner of three Academy Awards).
The Front DVD CoverHe returned to directing in 1977's Annie Hall, a modern classic that marked a major turn away to more sophisticated humor and thoughtful drama -- winning four Academy Awards. The film set the standard for modern romantic comedy and also started a fashion trend with the unique clothes worn by Diane Keaton in the film (the off-beat, masculine clothing, such as ties with cardigans, was actually Keaton's own). He also directed the serious drama Interiors, in the manner of the great Swedish director, Ingmar Bergman, one of Allen's major influences.
In 1976, he starred in, but did not direct, The Front, a humorous and poignant account of Hollywood blacklisting during the 1950s.
Most of his 1980s films, even the comedies, have somber and philosophical undertones. Many, like September and Stardust Memories, are often said to be heavily influenced by the works of European directors, most notably Ingmar Bergman and Federico Fellini. Stardust Memories was considered by many to be a biting piece of work in which the main character (played by Allen) expresses resentment and scorn for his fans. In the film, overcome by the recent death of a friend from illness, he states, "I don't want to make funny movies any more." However, by the mid-80s Allen had begun to combine his love of both tragic and comic elements with the release of such films as Hannah and Her Sisters, Husbands and Wives and Crimes and Misdemeanors.
Wikipedia
Allen was born in Brooklyn, New York, into a Jewish family. His parents Martin Konigsberg and Nettea Cherrie, and his sister, Letty, lived in Flatbush, Brooklyn, where he attended a Hebrew school for eight years. After that, he went to Public School 99 and then to Midwood High, where "Red" (as he was called because of his hair) impressed students with his extraordinary talent at cards and magic tricks. To raise money, he began writing gags for the agent David O. Alber, who sold them to newspaper columnists. Reportedly, Allen's first published joke was "I am two with Nature." At sixteen, he started writing for show stars like Sid Caesar and began calling himself Woody Allen. He was a gifted comedian from an early age.
He would later joke that when he was young he was often sent to inter-faith summer camps, in which he "was savagely beaten by children of all races and creeds."
At nineteen, he started writing scripts for The Ed Sullivan Show, The Tonight Show and others. In 1957, he won his first Emmy Award.
He started writing prose and plays, and in 1960, started a new career as a stand-up comedian and also began writing for the popular Candid Camera television show, even appearing in some episodes. Together with his managers he turned his weaknesses into his strengths and developed the neurotic, nervous, and shy figure famous from his later movies. He soon became an immensely popular comedian and appeared frequently in nightclubs and on television.
Examples of Allen's standup act can be heard on the album Standup Comic, including the famous routine wherein Allen brings a live moose to a costume party. The moose comes in second in the costume contest to the Berkowitzes, a couple in a moose costume.
His first movie production was What's New, Pussycat? in 1965, for which he wrote the screenplay. It was a largely unpleasant experience for Allen as he was trapped in Paris for six months during the production. Furthermore, the studio never showed much respect for his script, altering the film to the point where it bore little resemblance to Allen's original vision. Allen's first directorial effort was What's Up, Tiger Lily? (1966), in which an existing Japanese spy movie was redubbed in English by Allen and his friends with completely new, comic dialogue. In 1967, he also appeared in the offbeat James Bond spoof, Casino Royale.
His first conventional directing effort was Take The Money and Run (1969), which was followed by Bananas, Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex (But Were Afraid to Ask), Sleeper, and Love and Death. In 1972, he also starred in the film version of his own play called Play It Again, Sam, which was directed by Herbert Ross. All of Allen's early films are pure comedies that relied heavily on slapstick, inventive sight gags, and non-stop one-liners. Among the many notable influences on these films are Bob Hope and Groucho Marx.
Annie Hall DVD cover his most successful movies were produced in a ten year period starting with Annie Hall; other critical and financial successes were Manhattan, The Purple Rose of Cairo (named by Time Magazine as one of the 100 best films of all time, and Allen's personal favorite) and Hannah and Her Sisters (winner of three Academy Awards).
The Front DVD CoverHe returned to directing in 1977's Annie Hall, a modern classic that marked a major turn away to more sophisticated humor and thoughtful drama -- winning four Academy Awards. The film set the standard for modern romantic comedy and also started a fashion trend with the unique clothes worn by Diane Keaton in the film (the off-beat, masculine clothing, such as ties with cardigans, was actually Keaton's own). He also directed the serious drama Interiors, in the manner of the great Swedish director, Ingmar Bergman, one of Allen's major influences.
In 1976, he starred in, but did not direct, The Front, a humorous and poignant account of Hollywood blacklisting during the 1950s.
Most of his 1980s films, even the comedies, have somber and philosophical undertones. Many, like September and Stardust Memories, are often said to be heavily influenced by the works of European directors, most notably Ingmar Bergman and Federico Fellini. Stardust Memories was considered by many to be a biting piece of work in which the main character (played by Allen) expresses resentment and scorn for his fans. In the film, overcome by the recent death of a friend from illness, he states, "I don't want to make funny movies any more." However, by the mid-80s Allen had begun to combine his love of both tragic and comic elements with the release of such films as Hannah and Her Sisters, Husbands and Wives and Crimes and Misdemeanors.
Wikipedia
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